Inertia creeps

It also freezes, as in the case of this blog. I think my excuse this time is shyness. If the internet is a big party, I feel more content these days to eavesdrop on other people’s conversations than to make any effort to join in. Maybe this is a temporary mood, maybe I’ll kill this bugger off, who knows? For now, I should throw off the dust cover to see if the old girl still runs.

OK, enough metaphors. America was nice. Great to see family, great to see friends, and a fantastic week in Portland. There were quite a few unexpectedly rewarding reconnects this time, with people I haven’t seen in years. For example, hearing from a once close friend: “So that’s my last 10 years, tell me yours.”

This was my third return trip to the States, playing the dutiful expat role and enjoying it for the most part. San Francisco remains the greatest city on Earth. But if I do stay for another year after this, I’m not going back next summer. I need a break. A fourth annual trip seems both excessive and pointless. I realized halfway through that America and all that comes with it is just not that interesting when it’s obligatory. The buzz of returning diminishes more and more with each visit and the whole experience now feels a bit silly. This isn’t a slight to those I love. It’s simply that for me going to the States is not “going home.” Home is my bed, home is a sense of purpose, home is a pattern. Returning to the States is travel, it’s a holiday. And a holiday should be about having new experiences.

Now I’m back, and excited to dig into the new semester. This, more than any other, is my academic year to work hard and weigh what to do next. Things have gotten off to a rocky start and I’m flat-out depressed about the way things have started, truth be told. Well, two things really. One resulting from my own prodigious stupidity, the other from spending too much time trying to squeeze even a few drops of blood from a particular turnip.

Probably not nice to speak of people as though they were vegetables. But that’s all I’ve got right now.

Hey, this was fun. Maybe I’ll do it more often.

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One Response to “Inertia creeps”

  1. Yes, do it more often. It was great to see you.

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